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Tuesday, June 2, 1998

The formula of success

Rajeshwari Hariharan  
The hand that rocks the cradle, is the hand that rules the world. As Willium Ross puts it, "It is the woman who is responsible for the very existence of humanity." She is called Jaya because in her role as a wife, through her a man is again born as his son. From the traditional roles of a faithful wife, a dutiful mother, a warm friend, a loving daughter, the wonderful fairer sex of the world, the woman today has further roles to play.

Women have made their mark as ministers, ambassadors, social workers, engineers, scientists, educationists, doctors and as several other professionals.

How do these superb women dedicate themselves at the altar of this great and grand glorious life with good courage, comedy, calmness, cheerful confidence and yet be so lovable. How does the present woman manage her multi-role and become the leader of ``life'' in all its senses. What are the problems She has to deal with in balancing her multi-role which is so demanding and pressurising at all times.

In the Indian Society where we still have gender discrimination in the family, society and the work place, it is still a great challenge for women to make the multi-role work successfully. There still are many impediments and many compromises to be made to cut across them. Here are some women who have made it big in their careers and yet have been very successful in playing their traditional roles as well. They share with us their life time experience in playing their multi-roles successfully.

Meena Chandrawarkar, Principal, Abhinav Vidyalaya, Pre-Primary SchoolFor Meena who loves to be in the world of children it has been a natural thing to excel in her multi-role since she feels that where there is a will there is a way. In the 25 years of her profession as a leading educationist and a model pre-primary principal, her son was part of her life throughout her colourful career which also includes writing, guiding American university students, and a variety of other things connected with education. She never seems to have found any problems being a career woman whilst managing home as well. Basically she feels that it was because of her `Chaltha Hai' attitude at home, being very comfortable with a mess all around and not perfection driven.

According to her the things that go to make the multi-role possible are : - Stop feeling guilty, take things easy, have a lot of support system, handle crisis with courage and manage time properly.

Shyamala Ramamurthy -Senior Scientific Officer, High Energy Material Research Laboratory
For Shyamala the multi-role was possible mainly because of her hard work without grumbling? She enjoyed doing the house hold as well as the office work. According to her the multi-role is possible only when the woman has a good support system by way of a joint family support, there is division of labour at home, and there is a good understanding. Healthy diversions like music, Yoga or aerobics gives a good relaxation and helps the woman balance her multi-role.

Asha Anand Kelkar - Kelkar Nursing Home
A leading Ophthalmologist practising for the last 27 years Asha got into the profession at a time when still women were not keen nor allowed to make a profession. She has a husband who is also in the medical profession, has been very co-operative and understanding and that has helped her a lot.

Behind this successful woman are many sincere servants who have helped her carry on with her career without being anxious about the home front.

Asha besides being a successful ophthalmologist has administered her own hospital and done a variety of jobs including accounting. For her all this was possible because of acting with diligence, patience, share, analyse and sort out problems without sulking. Doing a lot of exercises, keeping control on diet and staying fit and healthy makes it easier for the woman to cope up with pressure.

She strongly feels that woman should never be in a hurry to make a family before making a career. They should make a clear understanding to the spouse about the multi-role. Stress in the profession should not be allowed to creep into family life. Initial hard work pays. Jayu Patwardhan, ArchitectA woman of excellent, talents and requisite taste, Jayu has never had much of a problem playing her multi-role because she has been so adaptable and sensible when it came to prioritising between family and career. She has worked part time or taken a break when the children needed her more at home.

It is the family bondage that has seen her through all along. She had always kept the rule that both parents should be with the children, in turns or together. For Jayu whose children are now well settled abroad division of labour, good time management, courage to face crisis, open and meaningful communication were all instrumental in making her multi role successful.And so what is the message for the woman of this generation who are still with so much of a conflict, torn between making a career and a family all so simultaneously. Can she achieve her goals with self realisation and self dedication or is there something more to make the magic formulae work.

One thing is very clear if you want to get life, you will have to give life and through this constant process of give and take alone life can attain its real fulness, real expansion, real perfection and real achievement.Life is full of compromises and the earlier one realises the better it is for a free, smooth and enjoyable life, especially for the present day woman who has so many things to achieve and wants to be so ``Complete''. She needs to compete through every trifling situation and every trying circumstance, fighting all odds, at all times.

Copyright © 1998 Indian Express Newspapers (Bombay) Ltd.


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