Like I found out. For the past one week, I have been trailing former soldiers who fought heroically in earlier conflicts and wars and have been rendered 100 per cent disabled. And guess where I found five of them who were injured in the 1965 Indo-Pak Conflict and are still alive? Of course, it is an open secret. But I had never bothered to find out why some of these paan kiosks are called `Jai Jawan Pan Stall.' Until duty forced me to find out. I salute my profession for helping me discover the unending agonies of our brave soldiers, who sacrifice their lives and limbs for our nation. But what they get in return is a measly pension and a hostile life, studded with hardships and financial setbacks.

No one recognises them. Few give them a second glance. Like Company Havaldar Major Krishna Sawant of the 19 Maratha Light Infantry, who lost his right hand and part of his left thumb. He rues, "I travel by the PMT bus. Often, it is packed to capacity. But no one offers me a seat. The hand that I have is redundant due to my lifeless thumb. It is difficult to stand for a long time, holding the bar. With my meagre financial resources, I have no other choice but to go by bus. At such times, I get a feeling that the people of this country, couldn't care for a soldier's contribution, and I feel sad.''

In fact, after having fought on the border, without any fear of life and limb, the disabled ones, are on the verge of poverty for the rest of their lives. Considering that most of them were in their late twenties or early thirties when they are rendered disabled and relieved from the Army, the `rest of the life' means another 40 to 60 years down the line! Imagine, the youthful zest of an enthusiastic and sprightly soldier is suddenly nipped cruelly. He begins to feel old, forced to lead a life of an old man - with the stamp of `pension' on him!

I visited the houses of these former jawans. I met them at the kiosks. And I found out that the apathy of our Government, no matter how much they tom- tom about their welfare for them, is pathetic.

Lance Naik Tukaram Gangaram Jadhav, of the 4, Maratha Light Infantry, who lost both his hands and an eye; Havaldar Shripati Arjun Patil, of the 19, Maratha Light Infantry, who lost his left leg; Havaldar Major Ramchandra Shinde of the 20, Maratha Light Infantry, who lost his left leg; Company Havaldar Major Krishna Sawant of the 19, Maratha Light Infantry, who lost his right hand and part of his left thumb; Sepoy G K Pillai of the Army Supply Core who also lost his left leg are all mere paanwallas now!

Let's assume, that's the risk any soldier joining the armed forces must take. But, in equal measure, the Government must show its concern for them. The Government might talk about free medical treatment to a soldier at the various military hospitals sprinkled over the country. It might also talk about supplying artificial limbs to the disabled soldier. But hear their trauma, through the eyes of Tukaram Jadhav and a lump will surely form in your throat.

Jadhav has lost both his hands and his left eye. His rehabilitation measure a small house at Laxminagar, a paan kiosk at Pul Gate and, of course, free medical treatment at the Southern Command's hospital. He was happy, until he realised the agony, as years passed by.

At the hospital, to meet the doctor, he is made to sit or stand in a long queue. If the doctor finally sees him, he is normally asked to take a blood report or an X-ray. For this, he has to walk a considerable distance in the sprawling premises of the hospital, to reach the respective building. Even after this agonising trek, there is no assurance that the doctor who recommended the test, will see him again. Often, he is asked to come another day.

Imagine, this poor man has to commute to and fro several times by the PMT bus and then goes round and round the hospital campus. He is fatigued. His body does not allow such rigorous running around. There was a time when all this was easy meat for him. He could climb the treacherous terrain in the most unfriendly weather conditions for the country's honour. But in return, the country cannot even give back a common courtesy. Can't the military hospitals arrange for a separate section for the treatment of disabled soldiers? It does not take extra finances to solve this problem. A bit of organisation and concern could help a long way.

These soldiers are compelled to spend from their pockets for their pains and illnesses, since they find it easier to approach the general private practitioner, in their vicinity. Even private doctors cannot distinguish him from the rest of the civilians. Jadhav was charged Rs 4,000 after he had a bad fall in his house, two months ago when his shoulder bone was dislocated. Maybe private practitioners could also think about this and give free treatment as a duty to the nation.

Also, I found out, it is one thing about artificial legs, but quite another about artificial hands. They prove cumbersome for the user. Jadhav and Sawant have put their artificial hands in their cupboards. Maybe, the experts could look into this rightaway. This may be applicable to most people whose hands were blown off, though I have no statistics to prove.Unlike former defence officials, these jawans do not even tag their rank in front of their name. So, no one knows their connection with the Indian Army. The roving eve of an inquisitive visitor to these kiosks may just fall upon the photograph of late Prime Minister Indira Gandhi who inaugurated Sepoy Pillai's kiosk near Aurora Towers.

Otherwise this prized possession often goes unnoticed. Who cares to see or find out? Aren't we busy with our personal affairs and selfish needs?On the bright side, these brave men were full of a positive attitude. They are proud that ``we have given a part of ourselves to the nation''. If you ask them whether they are happy with what the Government has given them, they say smilingly, ``Yes, we are very happy. After all, we dedicated our lives for our motherland and everything that the Government has given is as per the rules.'' Though, during the conversation, they have matters to crib about. But, it is done with such dignity that it leaves your eyes moist.

Here's profiling the five brave soldiers, who remind us that 34 years after a conflict, the wounds are still deep and the healing process is not yet complete!! And we, as a nation, have to rise to this occasion. It is never too late.