But then, this is Kosindra. The words dahej, paithan and dowry may be part of life for Patels in Charotar (the Kheda region), Kaanam (parts of Vadodara and Bharuch districts) and Vakad (Jambusar, Padra and Mohba), but they have no place in 20-odd villages of Kosindra and Bhatpur, in the erstwhile state of Chhotaudepur.

``Dowry? What's that?'' asks a secondary school student of the region, without trying to disguise her ignorance. ``The only custom here is kanku ane kanya (literally, tilak and girl); all that the parents are obliged to give away (in marriage) is the girl'', explains 83-year-old Shankarbhai Patel.

In Charotar, the dowry could be anything from 25 tola of gold, Rs 2.50 lakh in cash and other things in kind, Govindbhai Patel of Kosindra says. ``I am doing pretty well as a farmer, but if I have to go by Charotar standards, I'll be in debt'', says Rameshbhai.

``I do not know what happens in Charotar, but here nobody asks for anything'', says Kashipura sarpanch Jyotsna Patel. ``Monetary transactions sour relations'', adds Jivabhai Patel of Salpura. Anila and Savita Patel the latter is Anila's mother-in-law -- agree that dowry hasn't had a chance to mar their cordial relations.

Community leaders say their abhorrence to dowry dates back to the late 19th century, when Karunashankar K Bhatt, a teacher and social reformer, lived in Kosindra. ``It was he who taught us to denounce the dowry system, child marriage and superstition and go in for higher education'', says Amubhai Patel, an educationist.

Though wealthy enough to give any village in Charotar a run for its money, Kosindra's sights are set firmly on academic pursuits. Graduates and post-graduates are aplenty; many too are the people who've lived in Shantiniketan for studies.

Sumantbhai Patel, who's involved with sugar co-operatives, says they've been taught to stand on their feet since they were born. ``We have no desire to increase our wealth by getting it through our daughter-in-laws'', he says.Shital Patel, who got married recently, says that till date, her parents haven't given her anything. Her story is repeated umpteen times in the 20-odd villages, including Vasna, Chikhodra, Rajbodeli, Kasipura, Salpura and Vandharalamni. ``Elsewhere, Patels can do anything, but for us mental peace is important'', says Kokila Patel of Rajbodeli tellingly.

No wonder then, that when Charotar resident Mita got engaged to a youth from Kosindra, her parents were astounded to learn that her to-be in-laws had no demands whatsoever.

Maybe the rest of the community -- or even the State -- would do well to follow the trail-blazing Patels of Kosindra.