There are moments in your life when because of shock, pain, or a near-death experience, all of your life flashes by, frame by quick frame, as if in a final lesson of life. Having been through this momentous experience not once, but twice in my life, the poignancy and quick silver pace of the experience will stay with me forever. The first time I had this memory flashback was at a friend's party, while pregnant with Shiv, I choked on a chicken bone. I tried to pull it out of my throat, my friends tried to thump my back to get it dislodged but it was affecting my breathing and then came the flashback, frame by frame. I watched my life flash by and I had to deliberately pull myself out of the sophoric lull of the images. I managed to push the bone and dislodge it but knew, I had come very close to a near-death situation. The second time I had a similar flashback was when I suffered a severe bout of typhoid, brought about a few months after Raj's demise. Again in the feverish delirium ofa particularly viscous bout, I saw this life as it was, flashback, and the doctor's were very sure I had to be hospitalised immediately. Again, because I resisted the temptation to flow with the tide of somnamubulance, I was perhaps saved.

Life itself tends to be made up of a kaleidoscope of experiences which we may imagine are random samplings but the reality is a careful orchestration of life events. That one is master of one's destiny holds true only if one can grasp opportunity and move forward in the game of life.

In the past few weeks I have felt excessive pride in the quantum leap progress in the lives of two of my very dear friends, Anita Pratap and Renuka Choudhary. Both these ladies have experienced life in all its subtle and sledgehammer reality. They have been wrought as steel through the flames of life and are brave, courageous, one-of-a-kind women. Anita Pratap is perhaps best known in her avataar as CNN bureau chief, India & Asia. It is perhaps during her coverage of the war in Afghanistanthat her true grit spirit and never say die bravery surfaced. I guess when bullets whiz by your ears and mortar shelling in the background is like music, while breaking news live to our living room, a woman needs more than the usual dose of courage and chutzpah. The quality that I admire most about my `never say never' girlfriend is `her bite the bullet honesty' and candour. Since giving up her high profile job at CNN, she's made three docu movies and is all set to tie the knot with the Norwegian ambassador Arnie Walther come November.

With the same brutal honesty and a true sense and understanding of public life is my other girlfriend Renuka Choudhary. Without going into the history about her political beginning, she left the TDP, to join the Congress early this year. Renuka worked hard for her maiden election (she was an MP of the Rajya Sabha earlier) and came through with flying colours as the MP from Khamam in Andhra Pradesh. Last week I decided we three girlfriends had to celebrate not just theirachievements but raise a toast to our friendship. We went to Pawan Morarka's home for an engagement celebration, where the guests included actress Nandita Sen, Ritu and Ajat Shatru Singh the dancer Shovana and her husband Traxel, the Austrian ambassador, Ashish and Shalu Saraf, Himachal Som, Ravi Nair and others. When lady luck has been kind enough to smile benevolently on two of your closest girlfriends, all of life takes on an aura of celebration and festivity. We then went to Sweety and Vivek Burman's home for a cocktail on Friday evening where the guests included the various ambassadors, social debutantes and industrialists. We went on to Djinns at the Hyatt, for a bite and a night cap. To our utter surprise and delight a platoon of Mumbai's leggy, sashaying swingers, were there Madhu Sapre, Noyonika Chatterjee, Meghana Reddy and Sheetal Malhar. They had all come to the pub after doing Manish Malhotra's fashion show. I believe it was an eclectic show, fuelled by his unique, colourful sense of style.Another young friend Pooja Jain was bringing in her birthday as well so we joined in the festivities. Kiran and Ashwini Kumar were our hosts and to say we had a star table would not be an exaggeration, as Jules and Sophiya (ex-Channel [V]) brought a sense of proper English merriment to a lovely evening. The civilised thing about Djinns is that it shuts at midnight and that suited us prefectly. I for one know that in the flashback that races through my head the next time I have a close shave with life that this evening, with all my friends happy, smiling, cheery faces will definitely be there. Here's to life! And to great friends.