As An Actor,I’m Not Over

Bollywood hardly ever manages a correct representation of the media. How did you navigate the role? Did you base your character on a particular journalist?
My character in the film is meant to be the voice of the media,not one particular journalist. As part of my research,I spoke to a lot of journalists and found out that unbiased reporting is what everyone endeavours to do. Its not about what they feel,its about the facts. Even the journalists who reported on the Jessica Lall case said that in their coverage,they were conscious of not taking sides. I was fascinated by this dichotomy between the emotional and the objective side. I wanted Meera to be the voice of the media. When she says,Justice has been denied. You can live with it,I cant,its really the voice of every true journalist.

Dont you think the swear words were a bit too much?
The curses were put in not because Meera is a journalist. Thats just Meeras character. She could have easily been a lawyer. In the film,other reporters dont swear. Even when Meera uses the g*** word,it is a reaction to a viewer who finds her war reportage entertaining. Meera is a modern Indian girl who isnt living in denial. She is unapologetic about being great at her job. Take a look around you,girls do swear.

Its quite interesting that you get to be the voice of the media when your own relationship with the media is fraught with tension.
You know,Ive analysed it. By and large,the media has been supportive of me; its just a handful of journalists who have tried to defame me. Anyway,Meera is not a Bollywood journalist. Even if she were,I would have played her well.

As for the ones who try to defame me,I think,in some way,they too have contributed to making me who I am. The only bit that upsets me is the marriage rumours. Over time,Ive also taken them positively in the sense that they must really wish me well if they want to see me settled. The flip side is that these stories harm me professionally because they scare producers away. But Ive learnt to live with them.

What does the success of No One Killed Jessica mean to you?
Its a huge deal for me. Critics have said that my character emerges as the hero of the movie,which is heartening. The films success means that I wont be crying alone at night anymore. Its sad getting used to the feeling that your convictions have failed with the audience. Box-office success reassures an actor that people still want to watch you. In that sense,the success of No One Killed Jessica proves that Im not over.

During your low phase,did the attitude of the industry change?
Yes,of course,there was a big change. It did me good because I realised that people who were approaching me were doing so for the value that I could add to a film and not because of my box-office status.

Tell me more about that phase. Did the invitations to the parties dry up? Did friends become strangers?
See,not being invited to the biggest party of the year didnt bother me. I have never been the partying kind. That was the one good thing,since I didnt have to think of new excuses to not attend a party. As for friends,yes,some of them did turn into strangers but then it takes all kinds to make this world. I have learnt not to be judgmental since in our industry,its all about the survival of the most successful.

What lessons did you learn?
I’ve come to the conclusion that people like to see me in powerful roles. They like me doing masti on screen,not crying.

So do you admit your choice of roles was at fault? Too many crying roles?
It’s tough to answer in a yes or a no. When I cried,my audience cried with me. But maybe,I should have avoided too many crying roles in a row. Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna and Baabul came at the same time.

Do you also feel that associating yourself exclusively with one banner Yash Raj Films (YRF) was a mistake?
I did those movies with YRF because they offered me great roles. The day I got an interesting offer from another banner like in the case of No One Killed Jessica,I signed it. I choose a movie,not the banner. Today,people say that working with YRF was a minus point for me,but if those films had clicked,the same people would have said that it was a wonderful strategy. Its all about the timing.

Youre working with Aamir Khan in Reema Kagtis film,after Ghulam and Mangal Pandey. What can we expect?
Its a romantic thriller. This would have actually been my fourth film with Aamir. Ashutosh Gowariker had offered me Gauris role in Lagaan but I could not do it then because of scheduling conflicts. Aamir has always been very encouraging. I always learn something from him. Hopefully,this should be good.