Despite the assumption that President-elect Barack Obama’s Cabinet nominees are told of their selection via phone calls, the Los Angeles Times has learned that the Obama is actually notifying his picks by “friending” them on the social networking site Facebook. Requests to Obama for comment on the following transcript have gone unanswered, though he did “poke” us just as this went to press.

November 6

Barack is now friends with Rahm Emanuel.

Rahm Emanuel is cursing anyway.

November 24

Barack is now friends with Bill Richardson, Lawrence Summers and Timothy Geithner.

Bill Richardson is trading carbon credits for a new goatee.

Lawrence Summers and Joe Biden are now friends via The White Men Who Gaffe friend-finder tool.

Timothy Geithner is wondering whether take-out coffee suddenly got hotter or those protective cup sleeves suddenly stopped working.

December 1

Barack is friends with Robert Gates, Janet Napolitano, retired Marine Gen James Jones and Hillary Clinton.

Janet Napolitano is single and lovin’ it! (nota bene Ed Rendell.)

James Jones is bi ... partisan!

Timothy Geithner: LOL!

Rahm Emanuel: (expletive)

Eric Holder is begging your pardon.

Robert Gates is deja vu-ing.

Hillary Clinton wishes Bill would get busy with that drywall project at the house.

December 2

Barack is now friends with Bill Clinton.

Barack: Didn’t I try to “friend” you, like ... like two years ago?

Bill Clinton has joined the Facebook group Husbands Affected By State Department Ethics Rules.

Bill Clinton has no plans tonight in case anyone feels like grabbing a steak.

... contd.