Opinion Call to order

Should Supreme Court or Animal Planet step in to save the CWG... from the snakes?

September 30, 2010 03:58 AM IST First published on: Sep 30, 2010 at 03:58 AM IST

Is it time to call in the Supreme Court to clean up the Commonwealth Games? Its the only institution everyone is praising,for its decision on Ayodhya: BJP,Congress,the Left,the litigants. All we ever get to see on TV is people throwing muck (from the CWG Village?) at others. Sheila Dikshit criticised DDA,Suresh Kalmadi blamed everyone but himself,Michael Fennell attacked the media,the media attacked Mike Hooper,Hooper blamed the entire population of India for Delhis traffic while Delhi called these the Shame-Games, that too on BBC so that the world could laugh at us as openly as the South African High Commissioner did on Sunday,blowing his vuvuzela in our faces.

Viewers have been bemused by the constant reappearance of animals,reptiles and dirty toilets at the Village and on the news. Times Now found filthy bathrooms on Monday,after a weekend clean-up operation. The KBC question for Rs 5 crore (thats how much you can earn in season 4,promised host Amitabh Bachchan). Who could be soiling them and Indias image: a) human beings,b) dogs,c) monkeys,d) snakes?

Till last week,we thought it was dog or human excrement. On Sunday we were less sure: in came news of a snake sighted at the Village and on Tuesday,Star News said langurs were being used to shoo away monkeys possibly practicing their swings from one Village tower to the other. Had the Village become a zoo?

Or could it be spirits who are invisibly up to mischief? On The Chair (Bindass),contestants search out deserted places and whoever finds the chair,gets to sit on it. Fair enough. But then,they begin to writhe in agony,tortured by spirits while an expert tries to banish the aliens who possess them: Push her away from you,Aman. There,you are,now back in your own body.

Possibly,these lost souls,expelled from The Chair,wandered about and found a home at the Village? Alas,Star News dismissed this promising theory: on Saare Sawaal it said the Indian scientific community does not recognise the existence of aliens or spirits and presumably nor should the CWG organisers.

So what about snakes? Problem is: which type? If you have been listening to the hissing and sniping by those organising the Games on TV (sound) bites youd favour the human reptile. For the limbless variety,we require Animal Planets assistance to inspect the Village premises,first. They have more snakes on their channel than,uh,Khatron Ke Khiladi (Colors).

In recent episodes of Khatron Ke Khiladi (KKK),we have encountered bulls and dogs. Nobody has seen the former at the Village (not yet!),but dogs pugmarks were caught on camera. At KKK,three extremely well-trained hounds were let loose on contestants wearing heavily padded gear for protection. The contestants,or their clothes,were mauled. This round,dubbed unkindly as kutte kaminey was truly frightening. The show is living up to its fame.

Back to our Games-shame. CNN and BBC have been doing their bit to spread that like molten butter on bread. Of course,they had to report on the appalling lack of preparedness it is news but you felt there was a smirk in their reports although everything was said with a straight face. On one CNN report last weekend,the reporter took us painstakingly through all that has gone wrong and just when we were cringing under the bed,added kindly,(India is hoping) that it all comes together like an Indian wedding. On Sunday,BBC stopped by Delhis Khan Market where Indians criticised the organisers,etc. But before you climbed the Village tower and jumped off,it did observe that Jawaharlal Nehru Stadium was looking good. Really? Let the Supreme Court decide.

shailaja.bajpai@expressindia.com

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