Prison life has left its mark on Pravin Mahajan who is now out on 14-day parole from Nashik prison. Mahjan, convicted for the murder of his elder brother and senior Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) leader Pramod Mahajan, is now 20 kg lighter. Used to tap water in jail, he refuses refrigerated water at home and is unable to sleep on a mattress. He has given up smoking. Asked if he is happy to be with his family, Mahajan, who is now in his Thane home, says, “A life term takes you beyond all these feelings. There are no expectations. There is nothing to look forward to.”

The first thing he told his children after returning was that they should not take a leaf out his life while shaping theirs. “Though I have not done anything I regret, I do not want my children to follow in my footsteps.”

He also stands by his book My Album written from jail.

“Why Pramod Mahajan was killed is a story people will never know. What I have said in my deposition is part of the in-camera proceedings I do not have the liberty to reveal,” says Mahajan.

Prison life has not reduced the bitterness for his brother as he remarks, “I am not talented. Pramod was talented and he was more talented than he should have been. He was very intelligent and also dominating,” he says.

He spends most of his time reading. “I am reading a book on emotional intelligence. This is an in-depth study of emotions and explains what goes on in the mind of a person who does something hasty in a fit of anger,” he says.

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