Father and Son

He came to the world in the usual way

But there were planes to catch and bills to pay

He learned to walk while I was away

And he was talkin’ ‘fore I knew it,and as he grew

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He’d say “I’m gonna be like you dad

You know I’m gonna be like you”

Harry Chapin,Cats in the Cradle

Nandu and Gaurav Natekar (Sportsmen)
Nandu M Natekar has been one of the greatest sporting icons of his generation. The former badminton national champion has won over 100 national and international awards in a 15-year,glittering career,including being the first Indian to win a title abroad. He says,“As time passes,the role of the bread-winner changes. At first,as the parent,it is the father who provides for the son. However,as they both grow older,it is the son who looks after the father. I have,I hope gracefully,transcended from the first part to the second part.”
“While growing up,I didn’t know of the enormity of my father’s achievements and successes. It was only much later that I realised how great an athlete he must have been. By then,I had already taken to tennis over the family sport— badminton. But that never stopped my respect for my father,” says Gaurav.
Both father and son acknowledge that the relationship they have had with their fathers is wildly different from what they have with their sons. Nandu Natekar says,with a dint of humour,“When I was young,the times were different and seniors were literally seniors. However,today,a father gets respect only if he earns it. I had great respect for my father,and he imbibed the sporting culture in us. He was rather like a school principal at home. However,I have been very frank with my son.”
Both Natekar senior and junior also agree upon another notion. “Every son,at some point or the other,looks up to his father as a role model,with a lot of respect. However,it is the father’s duty to earn it and most importantly,preserve it,” they say.

Arun and Ajinkya Firodia (Industrialists)
The interaction and equations might have changed over the years; yet the fundamental perception about his father has remained the same for Ajinkya Firodia as he talks about their relationship. “He has always remained the overpowering personality for me— larger than life and very motivational. While the interaction was lesser when I was a student,it has improved over the years,” he says adding that the total independence that his father has given him in taking decisions has been a significant factor. With a father who has path breaking business skills,Ajinkya Firodiya need not look far for an idol in the automobile empire. “At the same time there has been a strong focus on education and I remember being rewarded whenever I have done well,” smiles he. And for his father Arun Firodiya it has quite oscillated between being a father and a friend. “There is a phrase that says that when your son is 16 you must treat him as a friend and that is what I have been following when it comes to the relationship between us. We tend to see the world in our son and want to see our reflection in him since the son is the one who carries forward the legacy,” adds Arun Firodiya.

Pt Rajan and Sarang Kulkarni (Sarod Players)
While the father- son duo are separated by a generation apart,it is the fine line,of treading between being a guru and a father,which was the main differentiating pattern for them. Speaking about the same,Pt Rajan Kulkarni says,“It was totally different with me. My family had settled in the city from Punjab and for me,it was more about not only establishing the music practice but also about ensuring that my son learns his music properly along with setting up his own music practice and spreading the same to other parts of the city.”
And speaking about the same,his son Sarang says,“It has changed definitely. I mean now,in addition to being a father,the more important thing is to seek a perfect balance between working as a musician and balancing a relationship at home along with the family and children.”
Pt Kulkarni also adds that the most noticeable change about being a father now is the fact that traditional boundaries between parents namely that of the mother being confined to the household roles and that of the father being the bread earner have fast changed. “Of course it was so during my times too. But today,a father plays an important role at the household as well. So the job for modern day fathers is a lot more challenging in its own sense as compared to my times,”he says.