Those of you who could tear yourselves away from Sachin TV on the evening Tendulkar’s 175 occupied total screen space on the news and Neo Sports, may be interested to learn that God is coming. Aaj Tak said so. Unfortunately, it didn’t know the exact time of arrival. Aaj Tak and at least one other Hindi news channel, had sighted UFOs over Moscow, too. Perhaps it was God?

Aishwarya Rai appeared like a goddess on a special CNN-IBN programme to celebrate her birthday. Rajeev Masand didn’t kneel before her but he did gaze at her with worshipful eyes as he asked her questions on behalf of viewers who had written in. Aishwarya answered all the questions with cool condescension even when she didn’t. Answer.Would she make a film with SRK? “I don’t have an answer”. The questions were pretty silly and baffling: had she ever been told that she was not beautiful (not really); could she control her giggle (not really); would she consider joining politics (not really). Surprisingly, there was just one question about her husband, that too rather childish: who is more mature, you or Abhishek? We take turns, she said, as if marriage was a game of Ludo, and went onto to explain that the two of them were child-woman and child-man. Wonder, do they call each other ‘Baby’?

Maybe we’ll send that question for the next birthday bash which ended with a cake-cutting ceremony and a friendly but distant wave of the hand. Here’s the thing with Aishwarya: although she appears friendly and forthcoming, you always feel she is someone you don’t really know even remotely.

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