Opinion How to be happy

Gilbert in Eat,Pray,Love is self-deprecatingly witty and effortlessly readable while documenting details of her allegedly traumatic life. She is brutally honest about her bitter divorce and bouts of suicidal depression. Her constant state of emotional flux keeps the reader’s interest even though her shrill musings on why she’s a wreck could appear to have more to do with her utter self-absorption and inherent narcissism than anything else. Still,problems real or imaginary remain problems if they’re in your head and the excellent logic of how bad other people’s lives are doesn’t always work.

The question of happiness is entirely one of perspective. Gilbert may be unhappy and single but a book advance has funded her year of travel,an opportunity most young Indian journalists could kill for. She’s quite attractive,has a healthy family,a pretty substantial bank account and,by her own admission,a terrific ability of making friends wherever she goes. Sampling a variety of delectable pasta in a café in Rome while pondering worldly pleasure,or relaxing on a beach in Bali,can’t be that bad. What’s she whining about?

Indians,meanwhile,even the rich ones,are thanking God for smaller mercies,like uninterrupted electricity and running water,acutely aware that there are no guarantees and this small privilege can be snatched away anytime. In times of retrenchment,we are hanging on to jobs by our teeth wondering how we will pay the next EMI if our company shuts down or sacks us. If our kids do not get 99.9 per cent they are doomed to study in obscure colleges while we drum up the funds somehow,to set them up in a career. But most of us just plod on,uncomplaining and relentless since there is really no time for a nervous breakdown or to consider lofty ideas like happiness.

Both Dominique Lapierre in his book City of Joy and,more recently,Danny Boyle while making Slumdog Millionaire observed the remarkable optimism they saw in the slums in Kolkata and Mumbai,respectively,despite the daily struggle for survival. Religious faith and belief clearly do help keep depression at bay. Puzzled sociologists coined the philosophy of “happy poverty” after studying the lives of the poor. That might sound horribly cruel but there are enough examples of well-to-do people not finding contentment to keep the debate alive.

Unhappiness in urban India,though,say therapists,is growing at an alarming pace where,broadly,people face problems in three spheres of life related to money,health and relationships. The inability to cope has finally caught up with those of us whose lives closely mirror our Western counterparts. But apparently,even Julia Roberts isn’t ecstatic all the time and she earns $20 million per movie. Contemplate that.

leher.kala@expressindia.com