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Humour in uniform

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  • A recent trip to Mumbai gave me a chance to meet again two distinguished personalities of the old navy — Admiral Rusi Ghandhi and Commodore Randhir Malia. The stories they tell you of the days of yore are truly fascinating.

    One of Admiral Ghandhi’s favourites is dated August 15, 1947, when the smart and handsome Lieutenant Ghandhi was ADC to Lord Mountbatten. After the “tryst with destiny” speech, J.L. Nehru and Dr Rajendra Prasad went to the viceroy’s house to invite Mountbatten to be the first governor-general of independent India. On his acceptance, Nehru proposed a toast to the king of England, and promptly three glasses of nimbu paani arrived. Nehru would have none of it and insisted that the occasion demanded nothing less than port. It took all of Lt Ghandhi’s resourcefulness to find the blessed drink at that hour; nevertheless, the wine arrived much to Nehru’s delight. A few months later, British Eastern Fleet ships came to Bombay. Addressing the crew, Mountbatten lauded Nehru, remarking that here was a man who had been repeatedly jailed and hounded by the British and yet, on the first day of his country’s independence, had the magnanimity to drink a toast to the head of his erstwhile jailors!

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    Commodore Malia regaled me with this precious nugget: he was the gunnery officer on the cruiser Delhi which had on board Rear Admiral Tyrwhitt. The ship was anchored and Lt Cdr Malia was on duty when a minesweeper, Rohilkhand, returned from sea (on a Sunday) and secured alongside the Delhi. The commanding officer (CO) of the minesweeper wanted to call on the admiral but was asked to wait till the next day. He was, however, invited on board for lunch. After a hearty meal, but more importantly a generous amount of beer, CO Rohilkhand staggered to Tyrwhitt’s cabin and knocked on the door. The admiral, rudely awakened from his siesta after his own quota of pink gins, barked, “Who is it?”

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