As the LGBT community takes out Pride Marches today in Chennai, Delhi and Bangalore, we bring you love stories that’ve blossomed in, and despite, our cities

KARMIC CONNECTION
Kolkata
The city’s considerable number of gay cruising joints didn’t facilitate Debjyoti and Manty’s romance. Theirs was a love story nurtured in its cafes, restaurants and movie theatres, places that most straight couples frequent. And never once did this obviously gay couple feel out of place. “In fact, apart from our first meeting at an LGBT film festival, we have rarely visited the so-called gay-friendly places. We have an amazing ability to make ourselves comfortable everywhere. There was a lot of public display of affection but no one seemed to care,” says Manty, 29, a doctor.
Their first meetings, like all great love stories, involved common friends and a karmic connection. “It was the closing of the film festival, two years ago. I had gone to meet a friend of mine, who was with his other friends. One of them was Manty,” says Debjyoti, 25, who was a student of law then. “The moment I saw him, I had this strange feeling. It was as if I had seen him before and I wanted to know more about him. It turned out that we had crossed each other’s paths a few months ago, when he was walking down the road with the common friend of ours. Our faces had been kind of imprinted on each other’s minds, and we connected,” he says.
A series of meetings with common friends followed — “They were more like chaperones,” insists Manty—before both were ready to take the relationship to the second level. “It was nice that we were taking things slow. Generally, most gay relationships are about quick gratification. The period of courtship was reassuring because emotionally speaking, I was at a crossroads in my life. Some people were becoming dearer to me than others, but no one seemed to be striking me as the one,” says Debjyoti.
After a month and a half, Manty asked Debjyoti out and proposed on the very first date. “I knew he was the one for me. He was gregarious without being overbearing. And there was so much honesty in his eyes,” says Manty.
But like many love stories, there was a stumbling block, in this case Manty’s career plans. “Within a few months of our relationship, he moved to Russia for further studies. I was quite pessimistic about our future,” says Debjyoti. Their relationship, however, weathered even the Siberian winter. “We would call each other almost every day and run up an astronomical bill. But things are better now because he visits quite often and we spend quality time together,” says Debjyoti.
Manty is visiting Kolkata now, and the glow on Debjyoti’s face is quite evident. “We have a lot of catching up to do,” he says. So what does the future hold for them? “As of now, we are quite happy with the way things are but I know we will have to take some concrete steps. I will have to come out to my parents for one. And that’s something I am really apprehensive about, more so, because they are so conservative,” says Manty. Debjyoti, however, has no such problem. “Initially things were a bit rocky with my parents, but things settled down, and till now, it has been a lot of fun! Manty has been accepted as another son of the family,” he says.
Will they participate in this year’s pride march on July 5? “I most definitely will. The Pride March is, truly, a mark of pride and freedom for me. It goes to show how ready the city is to accept certain changes at least on the face of it. Internal changes always take longer than external changes, but it’s a start!” says Debjyoti.
—Premankur Biswas

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