Cast: Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor, Vindu Dara Singh, Aftab Shivdasani, Amrita Arora, Jaaved Jafferi, Boman Irani, Kirron Kher, Sylvester Stallone, Denise Richards, Brandon Routh

Director: Sabbir Khan

‘Kambakkht Ishq’ aims at those who think from the groin, and hits the target unerringly: the hero and heroine of this heavily-publicised enterprise are eloquence personified--- he is a dog, she is a bitch. And like best of the breed, they circle, ears pricked, tails raised, throats growling, noses sniffing, all ends up, down, and the middle.

For the record, he’s Viraj Sheirgill (Akshay), ace stuntman in Hollywood, who believes women are good for only “two things”.

She is Simrita Rai ( Kareena), an ultra-swish model, who is convinced men want only one thing. Uh oh, actually, no, she is a surgeon, who bares her pretties only to pay her way through med school. And the film is basically to do with two of them jousting to add up the numbers: will Akshay-the-sexist-so-and-so’s two match up to all-men-are-hateful Kareena’s one?

While they are at it, we are regaled with jokes to do with all parts of the human anatomy: Akshay’s butt is the butt of a long examination by a fat Black woman from which he emerges limply. Viagra is mixed in protein shakes. Fleshy parts above and below the midriff are shaken. And everything is stirred every once in a while with wiggly waists and slathery navels, as Akshay and Kareena do the doodah in Hollywood – him in some jaw-dropping stunts, and her in seriously clingy sheaths and gravity-defying Jimmy Choos.

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