Cast: Saif Ali Khan, Pooja Bhatt, Atul Agnihotri, Sheeba

Director: Lawrence d’ Souza

Do not mistake this for the 1982 entertainer of the same name, starring Kamal Haasan and Reena Roy. But this ‘Sanam Teri Kasam’ is not exactly new either—it’s been stuck in the cans for over a dozen years.

It’s coming out spills open a can of worms, confronting us with the kind of dreadful cinema we used to make back then.

Casanova Saif loves ‘em and leaves ‘em, till one day he runs into the true love of his life (Pooja). They spend the first half of the film trying to get into awkward clichés; the next half gets complicated with poor Pooja getting tricked into becoming the wife of Saif’s best friend Atul, leaving Saif to mope, and cry on Sheeba’s heavily-pancaked shoulder.

Remember Saif when he started out?

Curly locks descending to his shoulders, all spindly arms and legs and beaky nose, all on splendid display. Pooja exhibits chandelier ear-rings, and wooden dialogue delivery. The storyline is laughable, involving undying friendship and groom-swapping and vials of poison.

If you’ve been missing such dialogues as ‘betiyaan toh paraaya dhan hoti hain’, rush before this goes—we give it a week.