Opinion The cave art of our times
At least TV commercials have recovered some of their zany spirit
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Theyre back. Not with a bang but in briefs. TV advertising has shown signs of a recovery recently,not all of it as entertaining or as wholesome as it might be. For instance,theres something so irresistibly silly about TV commercials for underwear: Indian male is at a swimming pool where he or his Dollar briefs catch the eyes of a foreign lady. He crashes into the water,the green bottle in her hand crashes to the ground and he rises out of the pool,triumphant at the power of his undergarment. Cant think why he would jump into the pool in his underpants ever heard of swimming trunks?
In another,a wimp of a man tormented by she-devils beseeches God and receives an Amul Macho vest from heaven which swells out his chest and bursting with masterful intent,he subdues his female tormentors. Moral of the story? The vest invests a man with testosterone. Cant understand why male sexuality is defined by undergarments when a good shirt would do the trick.
A silly but dangerous TV commercial is the Chlormint one with Salman Khan and brother Sohail. Theyre in an aeroplane with the latter imitating everything Salman does. An irritated superstar gets himself thrown off the plane ditto brother but while Salman has a parachute,Sohail has a backpack of books. Result? Sohail plunges to earth and craters his likeness in the ground. Should children,anybody,watch such ads?
The Cadbury chocolate éclair ad is also iffy. Wicks burn from the corner of kids mouths and then their heads blast open like bombs in an explosion of chocolate. Bombs are bombs and we dont need to burst,even if theyre a gooey brown delight.
Noticed the Reliance mobile ads? Theyve taken forward the Idea of Sachin,Zaheer and Harbhajan Singh speaking to fans with Hritik Roshan calling up long lost pals. Then there is the new Virgin mobile series which seems inspired by the success of the Vodafone Zoozoos. Here,a couple of caricatures in black and red,play games with each other eg.,lady in red lifts the dinner dish and finds a black head awaiting her on the platter and screams. Not nearly as funny as Zoozoos.
TV commercials are perfect barometers of popularity. Remember when the only male model in the country was Amitabh Bachchan who made way for Shah Rukh Khan and Aamir Khan while Sachin Tendulkar came and went coming more often than going? If you watch cricket on Star Cricket,youll see theres only man having a field day off the pitch. Hes in every other commercial,having completely eliminated the competition. M.S Dhoni is selling everything from Aircel mobile services to Lays wafers. Now if hed just chewed up the opposition instead.
TV commercials are also an advertisement for out-of-work actors. Consider Smriti Tulsi Irani who has only just returned to the small screen with Maniben.com (Sab TV). Meanwhile,shes been seen selling no,not soaps,but water from Aqua Sure water purifier.
And then there are some ads that simply cannot be quantified. Take the advertisement featuring a pair of eyes,beautiful,luminous,almond-shaped,but eyes nevertheless,beneath a pair of perfectly shaped eyebrows. Together they perform calisthenics and youre cross-eyed simply watching the performance. Look deeply enough and you enter the iris (what else?) and the magical world of Incredible India. Dont ask how,just watch it. You might have missed many of these ads if you were watching the South Africa-West Indies encounter or New Zealand-Pakistan the wickets fell faster than leaves in a storm,so that for once,we had to take a break from the ads and return hastily to the game.
Lets end with cricket,Anil Kumble is now a TV commentator. Hes almost as prim and proper as he is in his attire. Waiting for some unplayable comments,like his bowling.
shailaja.bajpai@expressindia.com
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