TV news is nothing if not inventive: it looked for ways to inveigle itself into the proceedings, by talking to Pakistani journalists, editors, ministers, India’s Pakistan hands, two Indian journalists there and the few onboard the flight who managed to communicate with the outside world. Of course, there was endless speculation. Breaking News: Nawaz Sharif Lands, Breaking News: Nawaz Sharif asked by commandos for his passport, Breaking News: He refuses. Breaking News: Sharif Disembarks. When was the last time a man’s getting off a plane made headline news?

All this, courtesy Pakistan’s private channel, Geo TV, with inputs from Aaj TV, ARY and Dawn News. Also, a well-primed supporting cast that demonstrated outside the airport so that cameramen had something to show for their morning. For once, English and Hindi news channels were in perfect harmony: everyone hooked on to Geo, and scoured websites and the Pak media for exclusive tidbits of information. Talk was unnecessary because there was so little to report. That, however, never deters our TV anchors who believe they are radio cricket commentators; that’s why they end up asking silly questions which tend to obscure the intelligent ones. They ask: “What will happen in half an hour?” (Sharif sitting inside plane) “What should we be making of this?” (Plane sitting on tarmac). “Is the situation returning to normal?” (After people are lathi-charged). Sensible viewers simply pressed the mute button and read Breaking News.

From the plane, Sharif took to sitting in the VIP lounge at the airport. This is when things began to go wrong. As long as Sharif stayed inside the plane, news channels had access to him. In the lounge, he was isolated. And so the confusion: Breaking News: Sharif Arrested. Breaking News: Sharif detained. Breaking News: Nawaz not to be deported. Breaking News: Sharif handed over to Punjab Police. Breaking News: Will go to jail. Breaking News: Sharif disembarked, was detained, and then deported.

But that did not mean he didn’t speak. First on Geo, then ARY on the ground. Lesson for Musharraf: if you have studied the gastronomical tract, know that the more you stifle, the more gets out from other channels. Also, news channels had taken the precaution of interviewing Sharif before he left London, so there was always a pithy quote on hand. However, nothing he could say, compared with the responses of Pakistani ministers when asked what they thought was going to happen. Interior Minister Aftab Sherpao led the way: I don’t know what will happen, who can say what will happen, at this stage I can’t say what will happen, but it will be “according to the law”! Such gems are unusual. Preserve them.

Winners and losers: Since all channels were dependent on Geo, the visual coverage was seamless. As for information, Times Now was ahead. Its collaboration with Reuters gives it that — the latter’s correspondent was on Sharif’s flight and got the first quote from the exiled leader: great to be back. Times Now was quicker than the others which means it was always the first with news and the wrong rumour.