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The mike in the mouth disease and other blunders

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  • Shailaja Bajpai
    People speak when their silence should talk for them. In the last few weeks we have heard remarks that ought never have been aired - at least, not on air. People ought to avoid the mike unless they are in command of their thoughts, control of their tongue - and mind their language. Otherwise, it can lead to considerable trouble and not a little unkind mirth.

    First, President George Bush was heard telling Tony Blair at the G-8 summit lunch, that Syria must get Hezbollah “to stop this shit”. Must have displeased the very propah First Lady, Laura, the Syrians and Hezbollah. Mr Jaswant Singh released his memoirs and with it the word ‘mole’ into the public discourse on India’s nuclear policy. The media has been chasing this elusive creature ever since; each time Mr Singh was asked by the media about the identity of this secret operator, he said he didn’t know, he wasn’t sure, he never said such a species existed in Narasimha Rao’s government or inner circle. The mole, meanwhile, wormed its way into the nuclear deal with USA and caused the Manmohan Singh government acute heartburn in Parliament.

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    Next on was Natwar Singh. News channels, helpfully, restored our memory and perhaps jogged his with footage of his denials when he was the external affairs minister of any inappropriate behaviour in the oil-for-food scam as reported in the Volcker Report. And, certainly he never wrote any letters. Now, he says, all ministers write letters of recommendation (what’s there?), the signature and letterhead on the letters are his but the contents (and particularly the language) are not and that the letters don’t ask the Iraqi government to give Andaleeb Sehgal anything more than a hearing.

    Then, Mr Singh went on to make things even worse (for himself) by spewing venom at the Prime Minister on the night that he was issued a show cause notice by the Congress Party - bringing the Guinness Book of Records to weigh in against Dr Singh. Two days later, he admitted that his language (please note!) was not appropriate. Mr Singh has gone on to make all manner of accusations about American involvement in his ouster from the government, the nuclear deal and other matters of grave importance to the nation on shows such as Walk The Talk (NDTV 24x7).

    Foot in mouth and sound byte disease afflicts cricketers, too - retired ones, in particular. First, Greg Chappell says Sachin Tendulkar is not entirely ‘fit’, although he is fit enough to be playing in Sri Lanka this week. Chairman of the selection committee, Kiran More steps in and claims the Master Blaster is completely ‘fit’. Just before he leaves for the emerald isle, Chappell suggests that it is to be seen whether or not Tendulkar is ‘fit’ enough to throw the ball in from the deep. Now, every single commentator will analyse The Shoulder, The Throw on air like they are orthopaedic specialists. Is it in the fitness of things?

    Dean Jones wasn’t supposed to be on air when he made his infamous “terrorist” remark about Muslim South African cricketer, Hashim Amla. That doesn’t excuse his inexcusable description were it even a joke. What it does is to make you wonder what commentators really think of players whom they praise on air, off it. Also, perhaps, former cricketers, many accustomed to expressing themselves in expletives on the field of play (what else is sledging?) are not always the most polite commentators?

    To end at the beginning: George Bush, in his initial reaction to the London arrest of persons who reportedly planned to blow up American airplanes on transatlantic flights, blamed it on “Islamic fascism”. If his choice of words were offensive, his contorted, mottled features made you want to look the other way.

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